This chapter is God telling Joshua the same thing that was told to Moses about the cities of refuge, where you can go if you accidentally kill someone.
I am writing from my desk in Seattle, WA. Genesis 30: So Rachel ain't happy yo; as you could imagine. She ain't having any kids (and that is how you measure a woman's value), but sis is. She gets all mad and tells Jacob to give her children or she will die. Jacob gets a bit defensive. Rachel presents a servant for Jacob that he can impregnate on her behalf. (not really the same thing ya know, but I guess this can fly) This servant (Bilhah) gets pregnant (and gets to be a wife in the process -- does 'wife' even mean anything??) and gives birth to a son. Rachel is legit happy about this. Imagine this happening in modern times lol. So this new dude is named Dan. This servant is fertile yo, and blasts out another one; this dude is Zapthali. Rachel is going on about how she had a struggle with her sister, and actually Zaphtahil means 'my struggle.' This reminds me of Pulp Fiction. Bruce Willis' character says, "I'm an American, ...
I am writing from my desk in Seattle, WA. Deuteronomy 23: We've made it, friends. The wet dream chapter. This has a rough start for the castrated. No one who has been emasculated by crushing or cutting may enter the assembly of the Lord. Well that doesn't seem fair lol. Also, no foreign relatives if you want to enter assembly of the Lord. Gotta keep that incest going!! But if you're third generation or more Egyptian then its okay. OH HERE'S THE FUN PART. If you have a wet dream then you have to stay outside of the camp until evening; and you better wash yourself before you come back. And when you poop outside, you have to dig a hole and cover that shit up! We close with a few random laws. If a slave comes to you, don't return them to their master, let them live wherever they want and don't oppress them. Don't pay any vows to God with prostitution money. Don't charge a fellow Israelite interest, but you can charge a foreigner i...
Genesis 5: I'm starting to look at the Jewish study Bible as I go through this, as well as a few other sources. This is Adam's family line. Buckle up; the intensity is going through the roof on this chapter! We are told by the author (which some believe to be Moses, how do we know?) that when God created mankind (remember the Hebrew word for mankind is 'Adam'), they were made in the likeness of God. We are not told what this means. I think it means that "God" "created" existence, and we are therefore inherently creative. This makes the most sense to me. Any idea of God being a big dude with a white beard is just too weird for me. Next we have the author rambling about lineage and exaggerated ages. THIS GUY IS A MILLION YEARS OLD BRO. LOL. During antiquity, it was actually quite common to embellish longevity and monarchical reigns; so this isn't unique to the Bible. The Sumerian King List is an ancient stone tablet which lists th...
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